“Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.” Hippocrates
Have I stumped you? What is vitamin F?
Don’t worry, I’m a bit gullible myself and surely thought it was a joke when my physician friend recommended I try it to help with my ovulation. Vitamin F. Did I hear him right? It’s been a while since I was in school, but I definitely don’t remember a vitamin F. Is this a new trend?!
Eventually I figured it out; Vitamin F is in fact FOOD! Oh Dr. Tyson, you still slay me!
Thus, vitamin F it was. Dr. Tyson is just a friend, not my actual physician, so I took his advice and decided it was worth the extra pounds to see if it would in fact be my magic cure. Now, for those who’ve struggled with their weight, you know it’s a sensitive subject. Being a recovered anorexic whose devoted her entire career to promoting a healthy relationship between ones body and food, it was hard to swallow. Eating more vitamin F would mean weight gain, but at this point, I’d try anything.
Before I get into the nitty gritty, I should preface for those who don’t know me well, I was not blessed with a fast metabolism and am not naturally small boned. I had/have to work hard at maintaining my fitness and eating a balanced diet to maintain a healthy weight.
This last year though I’ve thrown caution to the wind and ate and drank my share of goodies. I still do follow a fairly decent healthstyle, but rather than be so precise about hitting a certain nutrient value each day, I’ve allowed for a lot more flexibility in my meal plan. This flexibility has inevitably resulted in about a 15 pound weight gain.
I remember the first visit I had to the fertility specialist after I started gaining weight. Mr. CEO met me there and after the dreaded weigh in and blood draw, the nurse took us back into the doctor’s waiting room. As we sat there, thoughts and mixed emotions began racing through my head. What was she going to say? I wonder what my gynecologist has said to her? Does she know I’m trying a million different home remedies to help?
Then, in she came. Hands were shook and we all sat down. As the file opened, the first words out of her mouth will forever stay with me… “Wow, well look at you… you little fatty.”
Water immediately flushed to my eyes. Mr. CEO’s hand gripped mine ever so tightly as I fought back the tears from falling. WHAT THE HELL? Did she really just say that to me? Did she even read my file? Does she not know my history? Does she even know my profession?
As you can imagine, my emotions were raging. I couldn’t process anything from that moment on. Luckily Mr. CEO stepped up to the plate and listened to her synopsis of our case. I’m sure some of you are thinking why didn’t he yell at her? Don’t worry, I was too! But if you know my husband at all, he’s the one you want next to you in these kinds of situations. While I certainly lost my composure, he remained firm and strong to get the facts to help us move on.
Thus, when he informed me that I was diagnosed with Hypogonadotropic hypogonadism, I knew whatever it meant, I needed another doctor.
So, needless to say, I am now in the happy and caring hands of an associate at the local fertility clinic. She’s helped me realize the extent of my HH diagnosis which I will share with you over the coming months.
What I’d like you to know is that weight gain is a sensitive topic even for dietitians. Every comment or light hearted joke is actually like a tiny little splinter that won’t go away. Yes, I know I’ve gained weight. Yes, I know those cheese fries weren’t necessary and aren’t the best choice. But, I’m human. I liked them. So that’s that!
Anyone out there feel me? What are your guilty pleasures?
Jeannie says
Speechless. But I’ll find words- What I WANT to say in your defense may be grounds for termination of my membership to your website due to excessive profanity – but I’ll hold back.
This disgusts me actually. I am always dropping jaw when I hear of the ignorance and plain stupidity and insensitivity of others- especially in the medical field – ESPECIALLY from an endochronologist! Your husband has a lot of strength and self composure – you’re a beautiful person and I’m glad you are seeing another PROFESSIONAL-
Much love
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks Jeannie! I appreciate your support & encouragement. I know you always got my back :).
Elizabeth Shaw says
I love that. Totally agree with you, and yes, it’s an important MACRONUTRIENT- I love that! Stealing for use later :).
On a side note, I love that you love sweets. I am with you on that, and I fear if we were neighbors, we both would be in sugar coma’s after days like that lol!
Min says
Liz…gosh the more and more I get to know you, the more I realize how much we have in common. I’m actually going through the EXACT same situation right now..and honestly, if it wasn’t for my Hungryman, I’d be at a complete loss. He supports, encourages, and loves me despite how crazy I can get at times (who am I kidding? most of the time). We’ve exchanged emails before, but I’d love to talk to you over the phone some time if that’s ok with you?
Thank you so much for your honesty and willingness to share your struggles. I’ve gained a lot of strength from it.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Min, you just gave me the chills. I absolutely would love that and welcome the opportunity to get to know each other better! I think if it weren’t for the Hungryman’s and Mr. CEO’s out there, there just might be a whole lot of us crazies running around together :)!
It brings a warmth to my heart knowing you are finding strength through these posts. I will contact you tomorrow and hopefully we can set up a time to chat soon!
Happy Saturday!
gretchen | kumquat says
i am admittedly late to this conversation, but i had to interject. i’m so glad you two connected on this. such a blessing to have supportive husbands (they’ll make GREAT daddies) and sympathetic friends. i pray that your hopes are sustained and your bellies are full of new life soon. and that, like me, in a blink, the hurt is in the past and you have more little people than you know what to do with (and you have no time to blog. :))
Elizabeth Shaw says
LOL Thanks so much for chiming in! I appreciate the warm wishes and I too hope your situation turns into ours as well! Yay for mommies :)!
Jessica @ Nutritioulicious says
I’m constantly amazed and bewildered by the lack of sensitivity from doctors. I’m sorry that doctor made such a comment to you – it’s horrible no matter when said, but especially worse during such a vulnerable time. On a positive note, I’m glad you have a diagnosis and a new dr who will hopefully be able to help you achieve your dream.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks Jessica. I know, I want to believe it was one of those moments I was just very sensitive, but every time I replay it, I get upset. Maybe with time it will pass :).
I appreciate your continued support in this journey! Maybe sometime you’ll have to join me and Sara on a virtual happy hour 🙂
Beth Santisteban says
I am so sorry you were treated that way. What a very unkind and insensitive thing to say to anyone. Good thing Mr. CEO was there to hear the message. I would have shut down and been choking back tears as well. I’m hoping the future is looking brighter for you very soon.
As for my guilty pleasures…baked goods. By that I mean, cookies, doughnuts, cakes, pies, etc. And if it is chocolate, then even more so.
Hang in there my sweet friend.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thank you Beth for your kind words. You are always such a loyal reader! I like your style, good thing I just simple swapped a pumpkin poppyseed mini donut! Next time the boss owes you sweets, I will bake those up!
Sara Haas says
Elizabeth – Ugh, my heart goes out to you! How is that someone in the health care profession can be so careless! Stay strong and know that you aren’t alone in you’re journey! We are all here to cheer you on or provide a shoulder or ear when you need it!!!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Sara- thanks a ton. I know, I was at dumbfounded as you were when reading this probably as when she actually said it to me! I just wish we were all closer sometimes for a glass of vino, but hey, no one said we couldn’t host a virtual happy hour, right?
sarah law says
Hey there! You know we have had our issues with fertility and pregnancy loss. I reached a point of desperation and was determined to do everything “holistic” possible to help! I know that this isn’t for everyone but I am a new believer in the 21 Day Fertility Challenge! (http://natural-fertility-info.com/wp-content/uploads/992A_HR_21DaysBook-Final.pdf ) The idea behind treating fertility with diet is amazing but I know you can’t help but wonder if it is enough! I have tried the western medicine route and for me this was more of a meeting of the minds! I feel TONS better and as of today I actually lost almost 5 pounds without really working out.. I would take a look at it, Liz! I admire your courage, strength and determination! This is your journey and you are embracing to good with the not so good! I am always here for you!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Hi love! Thanks so much for your continued support and strength. You and Todd are true fighters! I appreciate your insight, I will definitely take another look. Take Care!
Adrian says
You live he IDEAL lifestyle. You are fit and above all know how to eat a proper diet. That alone is priceless, as we all know most Americans are unaware on the structure of a proper diet or life balance. You are amazing and your struggle and story will help so many others to help find solution and get them over this bump in the road. Keep fighting for what you want and NEVER stop. I am sure Mr. CEO will be there for you no matter what… he obviously has proven it. Smile its FRIDAY!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thank you Adrian! I really appreciate your support and kind words! I know I can always count on you to eat an Oreo or two with 🙂
Tara | Treble in the Kitchen says
I’m so sorry to hear about your struggles, but I’m happy that you have such a supportive partner and are working to figure it all out. Stay strong!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks Tara- it’s a roller coaster but I know sharing is sometimes the best way to let others know their not alone too!