Did you know this week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week?
Taking a step back today here on Wind Down Wednesday to reflect on a pivotal point in my life, the moment I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa. I call that a defining moment of my life; a moment that has helped shaped me into the woman, wife, sister, daughter, friend and Registered Dietitian I am today.
For those of you who don’t know me personally, I’m letting you in on my past today. I am what is considered a “recovered anorexic”. When I was 12 years old, I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa, an eating disorder that for me focused on an extreme restriction of foods alongside an obsessive drive to exercise. There are many different types of eating disorders (i.e. bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, and eating disorder not otherwise specified) and each is equally as life-threatening as the next. Although each disorder involves a variety of different behaviors, one underline theme is consistent, which is the need for control.
To make a long story short, when I was 12 I had to switch schools due to circumstances beyond my control. Despite the loving support I received from my family and friends, I still longed for something I could not have. As a result, I turned to the only thing that I could control at 12 years old… my food intakes. Day after day, I would spend countless hours obsessing over every little thing I put into my mouth. I had my “forbidden foods”, my “rules for exercising” and my “minimum” requirements I had to hit. In reality, it was a list of “no-no’s” I had limited myself to. What a way to live, right?!
Sure enough, I was miserable and depressed. I had no energy and had removed myself from all social interactions because that required enthusiasm I just didn’t have. Thankfully, my friends and family caught on that “Liz was not Liz” anymore. That’s when I met Gwen.
Gwen was the Registered Dietitian Nutritionist I saw shortly after the doc diagnosed me with anorexia nervosa. As I reflect now, Gwen really was my Gift. She was the woman who inspired me to become the professional I am today. Through meeting with her and understanding the importance of nutrition, I recognized that food truly was the fuel I needed to keep my engine running. Yes, it’s about balance and moderation, but food was not the enemy I had made it out to be.
I am not going to say it was an easy battle, but over the course of a year I learned quite a bit from her and knew that becoming a Registered Dietitian was what I was meant to do with my life. Sixteen years later I am sitting here writing this post as Elizabeth Shaw, MS, RDN, CLT, with a Certificate of Graduate Study in Eating Disorders & Obesity.
As I look back each year during this week, I still can honestly say I would not take back those years for I know it has made me the person I am today. Yes, having anorexia nervosa was terrible; I was in pain and I put my loved ones through hell. That I truly feel remorse for.
But, I recovered. I am recovered. Recovery is possible. That’s the message I want you to take away if nothing else. That you don’t have to live with these disorders for life.
You can, you should, you deserve to be helped.
I’m not alone in this. Many of my colleagues I’ve come to know through this blogging world too have recovered from disordered eating and since devoted their lives to helping others develop a positive relationship with food. Never, ever, ever, believe recovery is not possible!
If you or someone you know is suffering from disorder eating behaviors, be supportive. There’s a fine line you have to walk sometimes, but finding the right support system is key in recovery. Here are a few excellent resources to check out.
If you or someone you know struggles from disordered eating, please please please seek help. You are not alone!
Sending you lots of love today! Thanks for reading!
Lauren O'Connor says
I can personally relate Liz.. I had my first bout of anorexia nervosa when I was about 10 years old, about a year after my dad died. And have had some slips around pivotal points in my life since. (including after college graduation). Food intake was something I could control during uncertain times. I have since recovered but it took me a long time to truly conquer the mental / emotional pains that have haunted me those dark years. I wish I had a Registered Dietitian such as yourself or your nutritionist to guide me through. I took the long road, had some nurturing/support along the way, so I wasn’t without help. I just had to read (before internet mind you), learn much about nutrition on my own and am grateful because it is what lead me ultimately, I believe to go back to school several years later and get my Masters in Nutritional Science and become a dietitian.,
Elizabeth Shaw says
Ah Lauren thanks so much for sharing your story as well. It’s so inspiring to see so many wonderful RDs come forward with their stories to help others feel free from the food police! Thanks for being so honest.
Shannon @ KISS in the Kitchen says
Liz, I so appreciate your honesty and vulnerability as you strive (and succeed) to help others by sharing your own journey! Wonderful information; thank you!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks for reading Shannon- and your never ending support!
Amanda says
I am in awe your courage to share this touching and personal story, you are such an inspiration Liz! You have changed lives and someone out there is now seeking help after reading this! 🙂 You are such an amazing person and dietitian!!!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Ah Mandy thanks so much for your kind words and support. I wouldn’t have gotten through those years in IL most definitely without you… oh the memories from Nutr in the dungeons haha! 🙂 You will forever be my DI intern buddy, and love that we brought flatbreads to the midwest!
EA-The Spicy RD says
Thanks for bravely sharing such a personal story Liz. I know that your post will be a blessing for many to read. YOU are an inspiration to us all!!
Elizabeth Shaw says
EA- that means so much, I appreciate your support always. So glad we became friends last year! I can’t believe how quickly time flies!
Alexandra Caspero says
You are so incredible! Thanks for sharing your story. I love that you ALWAYS put things out there in the hope to help others. You are a remarkable woman! So glad I can call you my friend 🙂
Elizabeth Shaw says
Aw thanks Alex- that means a lot coming from you! We have a great group of RDNs out there- what a cool profession to be a part of! I <3 you too!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks so much Rebecca for reading- I too cannot wait to meet you in VT! It’s going to be such a great experience, feeling very honored to have been selected!
Min says
Loved reading your story, my friend! You continue to encourage and inspire me with your passion and determination to help people discover the healing power of food! Love and support you always!! 😉
Elizabeth Shaw says
Min, we are two peas in a pod! I <3 you too and can’t wait until the day we finally meet! Sending you so much positive energy, it’s unreal 🙂
Elizabeth Shaw says
Ah Melanie thanks so much for your kind words. It’s Dietitians like you that make this blogging thing work for me :)!
Kaleigh says
Wow, thanks for sharing your story! How brave of you. You’re sending such an important message of hope and are setting such a good example as a health professional on raising awareness and getting conversations started. I’m so inspired by you!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Ah thank you Kaleigh- that means a lot! And it’s future RDNs like you that keep us going! Congrats on choosing such a rewarding career!
Beth says
Thank you for sharing your story. It is inspiring that you were able to turn your pain into a lifetime of helping others.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thank you Beth! I appreciate your read :). Have a wonderful day!
Kristin says
You are truly an inspiration, Liz! This post brought tears to my eyes. I am so happy for you and all that you have accomplished.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Ah thank you Krissy! I know it was a rough patch for all of us then, but those camping trips I so remember how badly I wanted those Chocolate Chip cookies and wouldn’t give in! I’m so glad we’re able to flash forward 15+ years later and all enjoy multiple pieces of cake at weddings! 🙂
Julie @ RDelicious Kitchen says
you are so brave to open up and share your own story. Recovery is possible! As registered dietitians we can make the biggest impact to show food is fuel and to put it in a positive light.
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks Julie for the comment! I love seeing the + messages flowing forward this week from RDNs- we can make a difference, and we do!
Heather says
We all appreciate you opening up with this difficult story, Liz, giving a personal view of how you can overcome an eating disorder and providing those who suffer with hope! Curious about your graduate certificate — where’d you obtain it? Thanks!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks so much Heather. My hope is it inspires others and lets them know recovery with a great life ahead is possible! I received the certificate from NIU in my dual masters and DI program. It was at that time the only school in the nation with it! Dr. Amy Ozier was in charge- a stellar researcher in EDs!
Heather says
AGREED. There is a light at the end of the dark, dark tunnel
I’ll have to look into that certificate — mayhaps a distance version is available these days…
Cheers, Heather
Jessica @ Nutritioulicious says
Thanks for sharing your story, Liz. Very brave of you to open up like that, something you have done in the past and continue to inspire with. I’m so glad that the end result of those challenging (dare I say torturing) years was a positive outcome not only of recovery, but of turning your experience into your passion to be the best RDN you are!
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thank you Jessica! I truly believe in sharing these experiences because so many people feel so alone during these tough times. If I can be that support and light for them via a blog, client, whatever, I am excited and grateful I have the opportunity to do so. Being an RDN is great! Plus, an RDN + blogger, so much fun!
Tara | Treble in the Kitchen says
Thanks for sharing your story, Liz! I know that can’t be an easy thing for you, but I am so happy you have turned it into a positive 🙂
Elizabeth Shaw says
Thanks Tara- I am very open about this because I think it helps demistify the notion that ED recovery is not possible, I’m walking proof! :). I love what I do and know that moment helped pave my way for the rest of my life!